First Time Mom Fails (The First Month of Life)

I knew, when I became a parent, I wouldn’t be perfect. I mean, who is? The June Cleaver, cookie-cutter mama does not exist, no matter how hard we all try. Did I expect it to be this hard? No. Did I expect to have an incredible amount of #momfails within the first month of my child’s life? No, I absolutely did not! But, ah well, we all have those times we wish we could crawl under a rock because we somehow manage to completely wreck our children’s lives. Here are some of my first time #momfails.

I dropped a bottle of baby bath bubbles on my son’s head. Yes, you read that correctly. While giving my son a bath, probably his third or fourth at this point, an 18 ounce Aveeno bottle fell on his head. Turns out, things fall off those built in shower wall shelves. I’ve rarely had this issue before, but once a month old gets under them, bottles decide to fall! I was bathing him in his little blue baby tub, in the shower, and seconds after starting, there was blood shed. Don’t worry, the hit was minimal and my baby is a-okay! My poor guy did get a little cut, but it’s healing up pretty well, thumbs up to that!

Baby B’s Aveeno bottle head wound

I (still) have no idea how to cloth diaper.  I’ve been planning to cloth diaper since wayyyy before I even found out I was pregnant. Easy peasy, lemon squeezy! For a semi-crunchy mama like me, it should be second nature! No, people, no. It is not easy peasy. First of all, you have to wash the diapers, like, eight times to even make them absorbent. They’re diapers, aren’t they made to be absorbent?! For whatever reason, I decided to wash them once before putting them on Baby B, which was a terrible idea. His pee literally repelled off the diaper, and squirted up his little baby body. After cloth diaper attempt number three, I decided to wash them a few more times. Oh, and let’s not forget that it took me days to figure out how to actually put them on his wee frame. I’m pretty sure I’m still doing it wrong, but at least they are absorbing his bodily fluids a little better.

The first cloth diapering attempt!

I feed my baby formula. From a bottle. Oh no! This is a huge taboo, I know. Listen, I’ve had some breastfeeding struggles, alright? My supply stinks, it’s hard to get it up, blah blah, every excuse in the book. I cried, he cried, we cried. It wasn’t a pretty sight. Oh well. Bottle-shamers unite: I “gave in” and gave Baby B a bottle of formula. Then another. Then another. Now, I scoop that formula without guilt, at almost every feeding. He still gets breast milk and nurses on the regular, but hey, I shamed myself too, for a while. But, Baby B is happy and healthy, which is my main concern!

Drinking up that formula!

No matter what your mom fails are, remember, mommyhood is hard work and NO ONE is perfect! Rejoice at your imperfections, learn to laugh at them, and move the heck on. We are humans raising little humans, who will grow to make their own mistakes and have their own fails.


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